I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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