Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
