I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Randomize
