You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize