In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
