Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
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we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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