Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
