i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize