Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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