I want to stick my p in your. b.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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