you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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