I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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