Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
