I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
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