I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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