you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
