a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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