i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
