i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
