At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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