I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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