the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize