I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
