Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
