If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Randomize
