is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
