So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
