The maid of honor just puked.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Enjoy the penises
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize