I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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