I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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