I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
