I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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