just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
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I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
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His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
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