we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
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