Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Randomize
