you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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