This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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