Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Text me some of your sweat
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
