Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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