He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
You're like the curious george of whores
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
