Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
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