YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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