That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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