If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
