so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
