if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
