I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
