garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
