I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?