Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Well apparently he's into motor boating.

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  (248): Well apparently he's into motor boating. http://tfl.nu/kjue
  Replies (3) Good night (1174) Bad night (501) Order T-Shirt
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  (650): View more from California

  I feel great

  (650): View more from California

  I just peed on a car

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  (650): I feel great (650): I just peed on a car http://tfl.nu/eq9k
  Replies (8) Good night (2782) Bad night (507)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part

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  (612): who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part http://tfl.nu/ohmf
  Replies (11) Good night (542) Bad night (4727) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.

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  (301): Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable. (201): I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around. http://tfl.nu/syx6
  Replies (44) Good night (4092) Bad night (622)
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  (607): View more from New York

  i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.

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  (607): i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change. http://tfl.nu/yfee
  Replies (18) Good night (4590) Bad night (729) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...

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  (443): dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this... http://tfl.nu/lbrb
  Replies (95) Good night (7458) Bad night (1173) Order T-Shirt
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  (772): View more from Florida

  The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.

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  (772): The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again. http://tfl.nu/7v1u
  Replies (28) Good night (549) Bad night (4773) Order T-Shirt
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  (435): View more from Utah

  Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'

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  (435): Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much' http://tfl.nu/b5vr
  Replies (26) Good night (2275) Bad night (7874) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable

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  (608): dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable http://tfl.nu/uv0g
  Replies (8) Good night (2780) Bad night (997) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out

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  (281): She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out http://tfl.nu/guh4
  Replies (33) Good night (10954) Bad night (990) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?

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  (970): Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right? http://tfl.nu/vtmk
  Replies (7) Good night (2096) Bad night (535) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.

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  (970): I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious. http://tfl.nu/wv8w
  Replies (6) Good night (499) Bad night (1324) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.

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  (724): I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed. http://tfl.nu/6i3f
  Replies (4) Good night (1035) Bad night (392) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.

  (1-715): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.

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  (715): If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues. (1-715): I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes. http://tfl.nu/6qvu
  Replies (2) Good night (1039) Bad night (360)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  Pants off. Spirits lifted.

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  (253): Pants off. Spirits lifted. http://tfl.nu/wzml
  Replies (2) Good night (781) Bad night (166) Order T-Shirt

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