Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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