I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
