so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
